Mummy Guilt

It's a horrible feeling when you realise that you no longer have the time to devote your unwavering attention to your first born, but not only that; that you can't give the same kind of attention to your new born.

Mummy Guilt, I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels it. It's when I see my beautiful boy lashing out because his world has been turned upside down by this tiny new addition to the family, where when he calls out for me in the night and gets daddy instead and when after two years of nothing but him his mums attention had to be divided in two. It's not just that though that causes so much guilt and pain for second time mums, it's looking at my gorgeous new baby girl and realising that she will never had the same kind of uninterrupted one on one bonding time that her older brother had with me, that she will inevitably grow up with hand me downs and far less extravagant gifts. I can't imagine how bad you would feel about these issues if you had a third.

Then of course there's the guilt for the lack of attention, affection, time and/or all three that your husband or partner is currently receiving. It's enough to make even the most confident of mums feel emotional and awful.

I suppose the good news to second times mums is that eventually this guilt passes, and it doesn't take too long. I think once your first child adjusts and you find a bit of a routine (if there is such a thing second time around) things become "normal" and you just do what you have to do each day to get through.

If the guilt doesn't pass, I would encourage you to speak to your GP or a MACH nurse at your next appointment, as it may be a sign that you are suffering for post partum depression.