As a new mum and I'm sure many other mums (or dads for that matter) can relate, I made a mental list of things I swore I would never do as a parent, they may be things that drove you crazy as a kid when your mum or dad did them, they may be things you have seen other parents do in public or they may just be something that is important to you for no reason at all...... truth is we all made a similar list when we knew we were expecting.
Here's the thing - you can write that list with the very best intentions, but until you have that bundle of joy in your arms you don't know what you will do, and to be honest, I feel like I'm winging it every day as a parent and as such the list of things I said I'd never do is getting smaller and smaller and here are the top 10 that I've already broken:
1. Wear tights as pants (during those last few months of pregnancy and the first few months of mummy hood I lived in tights - and I'm ashamed to say, to this day I still wear them out as pants and not just under cute dress but as pants with a top and jacket)
2. Compare Cooper to other kids his age. Despite every ones child being different, it's really hard not to compare your child's motor skills or speech development. I think this is second nature though and something you really can't control so I don't feel so bad for not sticking to this one.
3. Lick my thumb and wipe off the dirt / food or whatever it is sticking to my sons face
4. Leave the house in clothes that have either spit up, snot, or food rubbed into them
5. Use dry shampoo to disguise the fact I haven't washed my hair in 4 days, you don't realise that washing your hair is a luxury in those first few months.
6. Use the TV as a babysitter - This one is the most recent rule I've broken, 20 minutes of the wiggles = an uninterrupted chance to get something done without having Cooper follow me like a bad smell
7. Be one of those mums whose facebook status is always about her child.
8. Rush to the Doctors with every slight cough or sniffle - I must say I am getting better at this one, but for a while there I swear the receptionist at Florey Medical Centre new my name, number and medicare card details off by heart.
9. Spend an entire day in my pyjamas - no explanation necessary
And finally the number 10 thing I said I'd never do as a parent and have done:
10. Tell my son no one will ever love him as much as his mummy - I dated a guy once who's mum told her son right in front of me that no one will ever love him as much as she did - well it turned out i didn't, but I swore I'd never do that. I think it took me all of 1 or 2 days to break this one.
Saturday 16 June 2012
Wednesday 13 June 2012
Teething and Trantrums
This week has been an interesting one. It's been long, tiresome and challenging. Cooper is teething again. Molars I think. I haven't been able to have a close inspection, the little tyke does not like fingers nearing his mouth. However the amount of drool and the screams when he has to chew his food, or in his sleep is a pretty good indicator, I'm just hoping they cut through soon.
This week I'm averaging 3-4 hours of sleep a night - the rest of the time I'm fighting with Cooper to get him to settle back to sleep, and more than once this week Cooper has kicked up enough of a stink to find himself sleeping with us (although he is the only one who does sleep). Alternatively there have been two occasions where I've sent Simon in to have Cooper sleep on his chest (which always works). Our saving grace in the last 7 days has been my gorgeous sister-in-law who kindly offered to have Cooper for 24 hours while Simon and I went out for dinner and had a full nights sleep, but wouldn't you know it Cooper slept like a log for her and I woke up more tired for having been well rested.
I've now concluded that Cooper is testing me. He knows how to challenge me, why else would he behave so angelically for my sister-in-law or fall instantaneously back to sleep when Simon places him on his chest, but he fights, screams and scratches when I try. Toddlers are amazingly cunning and clever little beings. Just the other day a girlfriend of mine was telling me her 14 month old would try to distract her by doing something clever before quickly running to do something he knew he wasn't supposed to and Cooper is just the same. If I tell him he can't have something on the table he will put his hand near it, slowly moving the hand closer and closer each time I look away until he is touching whatever it is he shouldn't be, always smiling with his dimply cheeky grin. I also suspect that his need to challenge me is why for the first time (of what I'm sure will be many) he threw a public tantrum spectacular enough to rival even the most terrible two year old.
After eating out for breakfast last weekend, while Simon finished reading his Sunday Paper, I thought I'd pass the time before doing the grocery shopping by letting Cooper pay in one of those cars that bounce up and down making noise after you put a $2 coin into them. Cooper loved it, he thought it was the best thing since sliced bread, and it kept him occupied and happy till Simon finished his paper. When the $2 ran out I picked Coops up and we started walking back to the little cafe where Simon was waiting. We got about 3 or 4 meters away from the ride when he looked back and saw another child sitting in the car, and that was it, he lost it. He started pulling on my hand, stomping his feet and then his legs turned to jelly and the bottom lip dropped. From here I cannot express how quickly it turned from a few tears to a full on melt down, the tears started, he threw himself onto the ground pushing his head back and arching his back and screaming, his face was going purple and he barely took a breath in between squeals. I was so embarrassed, I'd sworn to myself that I was not going to be "one of those mums" who yelled or dragged their child out of sight to what I'm sure was to give them a good smack on the butt. I simply stood there in shock and tried not to laugh. Still in shock I can't be sure what i actually did, but I think eventually I just said "I'm not putting up with this Cooper, we do not have public melt downs" picked him up put him under my arm and carried him like a football over to his father, Simon took one look at him told him to stop and that was the end of it. Once out of sight of the dreaded car Cooper was completely calmed down and happily sat in the shopping trolley looking up at me lovingly. I just didn't get it. Why did he think he could get away with that with me but not with Simon. I'm the one home with him most days, enforcing "no" and meaning it, he rarely listens to "no"from Simon at home,usually just looking at him puzzled as if thinking "I don't think you are allowed to tell me what to do" so why in public?
It was a test, his way of waiting to see if I would crack in public.
I'll say it again, toddlers are cunning little beings, always testing you and challenging you - and that just about sums up my exact thoughts on this week!
This week I'm averaging 3-4 hours of sleep a night - the rest of the time I'm fighting with Cooper to get him to settle back to sleep, and more than once this week Cooper has kicked up enough of a stink to find himself sleeping with us (although he is the only one who does sleep). Alternatively there have been two occasions where I've sent Simon in to have Cooper sleep on his chest (which always works). Our saving grace in the last 7 days has been my gorgeous sister-in-law who kindly offered to have Cooper for 24 hours while Simon and I went out for dinner and had a full nights sleep, but wouldn't you know it Cooper slept like a log for her and I woke up more tired for having been well rested.
I've now concluded that Cooper is testing me. He knows how to challenge me, why else would he behave so angelically for my sister-in-law or fall instantaneously back to sleep when Simon places him on his chest, but he fights, screams and scratches when I try. Toddlers are amazingly cunning and clever little beings. Just the other day a girlfriend of mine was telling me her 14 month old would try to distract her by doing something clever before quickly running to do something he knew he wasn't supposed to and Cooper is just the same. If I tell him he can't have something on the table he will put his hand near it, slowly moving the hand closer and closer each time I look away until he is touching whatever it is he shouldn't be, always smiling with his dimply cheeky grin. I also suspect that his need to challenge me is why for the first time (of what I'm sure will be many) he threw a public tantrum spectacular enough to rival even the most terrible two year old.
After eating out for breakfast last weekend, while Simon finished reading his Sunday Paper, I thought I'd pass the time before doing the grocery shopping by letting Cooper pay in one of those cars that bounce up and down making noise after you put a $2 coin into them. Cooper loved it, he thought it was the best thing since sliced bread, and it kept him occupied and happy till Simon finished his paper. When the $2 ran out I picked Coops up and we started walking back to the little cafe where Simon was waiting. We got about 3 or 4 meters away from the ride when he looked back and saw another child sitting in the car, and that was it, he lost it. He started pulling on my hand, stomping his feet and then his legs turned to jelly and the bottom lip dropped. From here I cannot express how quickly it turned from a few tears to a full on melt down, the tears started, he threw himself onto the ground pushing his head back and arching his back and screaming, his face was going purple and he barely took a breath in between squeals. I was so embarrassed, I'd sworn to myself that I was not going to be "one of those mums" who yelled or dragged their child out of sight to what I'm sure was to give them a good smack on the butt. I simply stood there in shock and tried not to laugh. Still in shock I can't be sure what i actually did, but I think eventually I just said "I'm not putting up with this Cooper, we do not have public melt downs" picked him up put him under my arm and carried him like a football over to his father, Simon took one look at him told him to stop and that was the end of it. Once out of sight of the dreaded car Cooper was completely calmed down and happily sat in the shopping trolley looking up at me lovingly. I just didn't get it. Why did he think he could get away with that with me but not with Simon. I'm the one home with him most days, enforcing "no" and meaning it, he rarely listens to "no"from Simon at home,usually just looking at him puzzled as if thinking "I don't think you are allowed to tell me what to do" so why in public?
It was a test, his way of waiting to see if I would crack in public.
I'll say it again, toddlers are cunning little beings, always testing you and challenging you - and that just about sums up my exact thoughts on this week!
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| this week it's a love / hate relationship |
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