A working holiday

You'll often hear mother's proclaim that a holiday is just much of the same day to day chores in a different location, yes that may be true but isn't the priceless looks of excitement and curiosity on your child's face worth every second?

We headed off on our 3rd family vacation just last week to my families holiday unit on the beautiful mid north coast of Australia, and although packing the car has gotten far more challenging as Cooper gets older the time away could not have been more enjoyable. I think it's a true blessing to be able to bring Cooper and my husband to a place that has provided me with so many precious childhood memories over the last 20 years, the wonderful surf, sunny weather and great rock pools that brought a smile to my cheeky face  now does the same for my son.

I find it rather ironic that the smallest person in the family requires the most luggage, amongst the golf clubs and shared suitcase for Simon and I packed into the boot was a porta-cot, bed sheets, toys, walker, portable high chair, cloth nappies, clothes, strollers, sun shades and bottles. Thank goodness we don't own a small car! Some may find a  long car trip with a 12 month old to be challenging, fortunately for us Cooper travels really well, he happy chats away to himself, his toys or his reflection for the majority of the trip, sleeping the remainder of the time and only starting to get restless about 30 mins from our destination. By the time the 6 hour drive is over we are all ready to break free of the condiment of the car and while I leave unpacking the car to Simon, I make a start on getting the beds made and Cooper feeling settled in and comfortable.

Over the next few days we take Cooper swimming in the ocean, exploring the rock pools and feeding those pesky seagulls, and although I am not much of an ocean swimmer I am sure to show Cooper how much fun the water can be, it becomes quickly apparent though that my son is 100% fearless and does not need me to encourage him one little iota. He'd crawl straight into the surf if we'd let him, laughing and splashing as the waves white water surrounds his body, and although I am pleased that he enjoys the surf so much I am worried that he does not yet understand how dangerous and deadly the ocean can be.

Cooper is also very BOLD, he'll quickly crawl over to the nearest group of kids playing with a ball on the sand and want to be part of it, he has obviously inherited my extroverted nature but doesn't understand that he isn't quite big enough to join in just yet.

Amongst all of the good times it is a bit harder while on holiday, both Simon and I felt we deserved a break and so when it came to waking early when Cooper was ready for breakfast or arranging his meals and bed time we'd both look at each other and think "surely it's your turn", and I guess that's the difference between "holiday Helene" and "everyday Helene" I don't just get up and do what needs to be done, there's that underlying sense of selfishness while you are on a break and a tiny little bit of resentment if it's left up to you to get everything done as you would at home. Fortunately for Simon and I his family joined us for a few days, giving us both a bit of a break and together time and ensuring that that feeling of "why can't you do it" never lingered for too long.

Simon and Cooper go swimming



My beach babe



Is there ever the PERFECT time for #2

Well it's official I HAVE BABY FEVER again! In fact I've had baby fever for at least 2 months now, but the arrival of my best friends baby girl just moments ago has just accelerated it further and has prompted me to update my blog with this post.

Deep down I know Simon and I aren't quite ready for a second little one just yet, we've just got settled into a good routine with Cooper, work and daycare, and we are enjoying spoiling him and watching him grow, hitting every big milestone and in awe of his achievements. We are also enjoying the time we have alone together again now Coops is a little more independent and sleeping well, but most of all we are enjoying being a family of 3.

There's a lot to think about when planning for number 2, there's the logistics of having 2 under 2 or there abouts, the space at home in a 3 bedroom house, money and the amount of time to take off work. Financially we'd manage, although the cost of 2 in daycare scares the hell out of me, we'd make do for a year or so until Cooper headed into pre-school, I've never wanted money to be a reason not to have another baby, but the reality is in this day and age it has to be, at the very least, a consideration, after all you want your children to have the best life they can.

There are 2 major things that play on my mind when the thought of extending our family enters my mind; my Dad's reaction/opinion on the matter and my career/contract at work.

The first thing I can deal with, like the reaction when we told my Dad we were expecting Cooper, I know he will be concerned not just for me during the pregnancy or the stress of having two young children on our relationship but also about our finances and how we will be able to afford it. To clarify, my Dad is an accountant, he has always been one to stress about our bank balances even from a very young age, always stressing the importance of saving and never extending ourselves too far. He also knows we are saving for our first family home and he knows the stresses of raising a family / childcare and the cost of living in Canberra (one of the most expensive cities to live in in Australia) has on us. I respect my Dad a lot, I love him very much, but if there is one thing that causes arguments or tension between us it's money and his opinions on how we spend it or save it. I know that he will be thrilled for me when we announce a second pregnancy, but I am also all too aware of the financial advice and concern he will openly express.

Secondly there is work, my contract is 4 years long, I am currently a little over half way through and as you may have read in an earlier post I'm really in a good position career wise, with a supportive manager and good team of people around me. I would be lying though if I said I wasn't at all concerned about how another bout of maternity leave would affect my career and contract extension options. Truth be told Simon and I have actually thought long and hard about the timing of our next pregnancy and how it will affect my career and his study, but should we really be that concerned? After all a baby is a great thing to have in your life.

With Cooper everything was planned, we started trying so my Maternity leave would coincide perfectly with end of financial year at work and finish with the first working day in the new year. True to form my crazy obsessive compulsive nature to be organised meant that my replacement at work came in with the new budget complete finalised and every current research project 100% up to date with reporting and filing. It was also timed perfectly so that I returned to work with exactly 2 years remaining on my contract. However that was before I was struck down with this crazy baby fever and were planning a nice 3 year gap between our little ones, allowing me to devote the remaining 2 years of my contract to establishing myself as completely irreplaceable in the office and having my contract renewed before trying again. Now those plans are out of the question, and even though at the time I did not enjoy pregnancy with Cooper, the thought of another baby growing in there makes my heart swell with love and excitement and I've started to think about when the right time is for me this time? How will it effect my job, career progression and most importantly my contract renewal?

So I guess I'm wondering how many other couples time their pregnancies around their career,  the timing of their return to work after maternity leave, or for that matter the amount in their savings account? Surely I can't be the only one?

All the single ladies

Single Mums............... I don't know how you do it!

There have been times when I have proclaimed I feel like a single parent. Simon's work / study schedule is hectic, he's up at 4:30am most mornings and home at 7:30-8pm, if we are lucky we see him Wednesday afternoons and Sunday's, the rest of the time, Cooper is usually in bed sound asleep by the time Simon is home. Most days I'm up at 7 and getting both Cooper and I ready for daycare and work, trying to get both of us dressed, fed and out the door by 7:40am. It's a rush, and I suppose I could get up earlier to make it less so, but as new mum's will know, sleep is the much higher priority.

Of an afternoon, I'm on pick up, I am one of the lucky ladies though, who has childcare facilities at work so it's nice and easy, when I get home it's a chaotic mess of organising dinner for Simon and I, lunches and back packs for the next day, dinner time for Cooper, bath and bedtime before 7pm. After Cooper is asleep, I do a quick surface clean, tidying toys, wiping down beaches and putting washing on or away. Simon will usually get home just as I finish getting dinner cooked which is perfect timing. By about 8:30pm the kitchen is cleaned and I lay out Cooper's and my own clothes for the next day as Simon gets himself organised or does a bit of study. This is a typical day and it wasn't until Simon headed off on a work conference that I realised even though he doesn't really help out a lot during the week at home, he really makes up for it on the weekend or times he does get home early. Just doing the little things while I'm busy with Cooper helps out immensely, he'll put a load of washing on, or fold a basket of clothes or it's nice to just have him watch Cooper so I can enjoy my shower or actually take the time to straighten my hair properly. It's in these instances that I think to myself I don't know how single mums do it, especially those with twins or more than one child!

I guess I just wanted to write a quick post about my admiration for single mums and I will never proclaim again that I do it alone!