One the 2nd of July I started experiencing some mild cramping followed by a small amount of spotting, I was convinced (or I should say rather hopeful) it was implantation bleeding, but was shot down pretty quickly when I posted the below image of my chart and asked fellow trying to conceive mums on the bump.com, with almost everyone saying that 5 DPO (days past ovulation) was too early for implantation to occur and it seemed highly unlikely that I would have even ovulated yet given I hadn't really seen a surge in my basal body temperature (BTT) They may have been right, it seemed that this month my body decided to change the goal posts and rather than ovulating on CD 11 as in the previous 5 months, it waited till CD 15.
What the Hell!
I was upset and disappointed, another month down and what I'm sure was going to be another negative test awaited.
It was 7am 10 DPO. I decided that even though I knew it was going to be negative I should take the test, I took it, put it down and headed straight in to wake Cooper up, knowing that regardless of what the test revealed this month I had one beautiful baby boy already in my arms.
Another BFN........... I was wrong the sting of the result hurt just as much this month, and I started crying.
After speaking with a close friend, who swore it helped her relax while TTC I booked in for my first acupuncture session. From all accounts acupuncture is supposed to be one of the best non-medicated medicines to help conception as it is said to relax you and to help regulate your hormones and thus, in turn regulate your cycles.
At 13 DPO and Day 28 of my cycle I still had not had a visit from Aunt Flow, I started to feel frustrated, was I or wasn't I. To make matters worse I was feeling small twinges and had felt nauseous the night before. Another negative test but a 3 day late period - that's just unfair, my body was now playing games with me. How after 6+ months of regular 25 day cycles did it just decide that it would change now, and to be out by so many days was completely uncharacteristic for me?! Was it the acupuncture? After one session had my body responded by lengthening it's luteal phase, or simply not menstrating?
Fortunately I didn't have to wait long to wait as I had booked my second acupuncture appointment 2 days later. Now on CD 30 and still no sign of an approaching period I had a bevy of questions:
- Can acupuncture throw off your cycle
- Will this mean my next cycle is completely out of whack too
- Does the lack of a period mean I didn't ovulate
The technician did a quick sweep and couldn't find anything drastically out of the norm and encouraged me to head up to the hospital if the pain did not improve. I did just that. I was admitted instantly, put on an IV of morphine as they ran a plethetude of tests to try to isolate the cause of the pain. Eventually I was told there was a possibility that I was suffering from an ectopic pregnancy. I was scared and emotional, but with my husband by my side I knew I would be ok.
They took me in for surgery that night, and the next morning I woke with 3 new holes in my body, but the cramping had stopped. I was discharged later that day and sent home with panadine forte and told not to drive, lift or exhurt myself too much for 4-6 weeks. I was devastated that I could not hold and lift my baby boy.
At around 6pm I took the first two pain killers, I threw them up violently, and it did not stop there, I proceeded to be ill every 15 mins for the next hour, straining and clenching my already very tender stomach before I begged my mum (who had come down to help with Cooper) and my husband to take me back to emergency. I could not stop shaking, they placed me on another morphine drip and admitted me back into the short stay unit. After 24 hours of pain relief and medication to stop me from throwing up, I was sent up to the wards where I would spend at least another night.
After 3 nights in hospital I was discharged. I'm happy to report that I am feeling much better. Still a little sore and emotional, but better.
After my time in hospital I spent a week recovering at home. My darling husband by my side, lifting his weight and mine around the house ensuring that I didn’t lift anything heavier than a feather and making sure Cooper was well tended to. Around the 3rd day at home I received a phone call from my Dr. He had a few more of the blood test results back, and it was a shock to both of us when he told me my thyroid was underactive. I didn’t quite understand at first, I’ve always been so healthy and aside for feeling a little lethargic over the past few months (which I had out down to being back at work and juggling an ever so active toddler) I had no symptoms.
Stupidly I jumped straight on Dr Google, and in no more than 5 mins I was in tears, some of the impacts on my life could include, uncontrollable weight gain (oh perfect – just what I wanted to hear), depression, but the most horrible of all included infertility, the inability to carry a healthy baby to term or the possibility of birth defects or autism. It seemed that getting medication also took some work, with it often taking months to get the dosage right.
I was devastated; my dream of having 2 under 2 was slipping away so quickly, I can’t explain how heart breaking it was. I was truly gutted, not only had we suffered enough with my time in hospital, an operation and subsequent “pelvic rest”, but now something that could not be controlled by any means other than blood tests and medication. My husband begged me to focus on what is most important, getting my health back on track, which in turn would ensure that any future pregnancies would run smoothly, with the unborn child being a healthy weight and perfect just like Cooper.
Thanks to all the love I received from my June 2011 mummas on FB and all my dearest friends and family for your support during this time.
