2022 and 9 years old.
Another lap around the sun with you darling daughter and what a lap it's been. In the past 12 months you've suffered through more remote learning and lockdowns thanks to a pre Christmas COVID surge, changed schools, been selected for representative netball, been vaccinated, suffered from COVID infection, had 2 trips to Cairns to visit the Corwell's cancelled, finally getting there in April this year, loved having your cousin Hannah back in Australia and absolutely turned a corner with you reading and spelling.
The tail end of 2021 was really uneventful for us as a family. We spent July through October in lockdown during remote learning and even after that we thrust in and out of isolation periods due to contact exposures through Dads work and the boys daycare. It was a rough end to the year for you, but in some ways I really think it helped you to focus on the new year and school ahead.
As you'll remember Dad and I decided to have you repeat year 3 in your new school. It meant that you would be able to compete with peers in Cross country and sports Carnivals and we believed it would help you gain confidence back with your reading and spelling. It wasn't long into your new school when during a parent teach interview the teacher remarked how well you are doing in class academically with the goals we'd set for you and how well liked and popular you were in class. You are thoughtful, kind, competitive and you won't be bullied or let others be bullied. 3 weeks in and you were running for Student Representative Council (you didn't get nominated this year, but I am sure you will in the future).
We are still having disagreements, mostly over Cooper's growing independence and your lack there of. It's hard being a mum and raising a daughter. The world just isn't as safe for you as it is for Cooper and rightly or wrongly I need to protect you from it for a little longer. I know it seems unfair, and believe me when i tell you baby girl I never wanted to be this way, but the truth is its safer for Cooper and his mates to walk to the shops alone than it is for you and your friends to, and it's hard to understand and I know how unfair it feels, but I so wish you wouldn't fight me so hard every time on this. Give me time, another year and maybe I'll be more comfortable with it.
Living with the twins breaks your heart these days. You used to be their whole world, they were yours and yours alone but now that's changed. They aren't interested in anything other than what Cooper is doing, where Cooper is, what Cooper's eating. There are the odd occasions where they may tolerate having their nails painted or the faces plastered with make up, but as a whole you spend a lot of time angry and crying about having no one who loves you, how no one understands that your'e a girl and don't want to do "boy" things, and how you don't feel like anybody wants you around. I know it's hard for you, but it's also hard for me to hear this. I feel you are being well over dramatic, I try to support you and spend time with just you but it's not enough for you. It's not my time you want. You want to feel included and loved by your brothers. . They do love you..... we all love you, as the only daughter in my family, I understand more than anyone how it feels to be left out, but it's hurting you and you find it hard to control that emotion these days and we fight so much because of it. I just want you to be resilient, care free and I want you to not care about being included and just be your own person. Yet, you just can't get past it and it hurts me that we fight about this over and over and over again. It's my fear that you'll "run away" one of these days if I cant find a solution that works for you, I want you to know I have tried and I'm still trying to have you understand that you are so important to this family, whether you feel it now or not. We're trying our best as parents Zoe and I hope when these next hormone charged years are behind us you'll see that.
With all that said though you still call out from bed each night "good night mum, have a good sleep, see you in the morning, I love you", you still run to me for kisses goodbye before school, for hugs at the end of the day. While we fight, we still love on each other every single day. I've never been the mum into nails or make overs, I know you find it frustrating that most of the playing I do with you kids is outdoors, kicking balls, riding bikes, going on adventures and not craft (which you still love by the way. Remember the awful parrot I painted when I tried really hard to do something you enjoyed baby girl). That's why your selection in the Yass u11 representative netball side was such a great thing for us. I absolutely adore watching you play and the carnivals are giving us a real chance to spend some time alone together. I love watching you run, I love your feisty soccer games, I love your spirit. I genuinely love everything about you.
Even though this year has been hard for us it won't surprise you that I still think you are the most amazing human being. I am honestly so lucky I get to call you my girl. I am in awe of your confidence and grit. You continue to be our little pocket rocket, your smile lights the room, you are absolute perfection and I am incredibly proud of the young lady we are raising.
You are my Warrior woman 💖
Happy birthday my darling, you are truly wonderful. We love you.
You Love: Athletics and running, netball carnivals, playing on the street with the neighbours till the street lights come on,
You have: lost 6 teeth - and we are about to embark on your orthodontic journey to braces
You weigh 29.7kilo
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